Breadcrumb Diary: Week 9

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#1 Breadchums
The redoubtable Ruddo and I oft have discussions on all things odd, peculiar and unexplainable (ourselves mostly). Late last year on the night of the Nick Harper gig in Chester, we discussed a great many things ‘new age’, from consciousness studies, through déjà vu (vecu) theories and on to quantum mechanics, until the point at which Peroni rendered his mind/vocal chord coordination temporarily inoperable.

I recall (although it’s more than likely he doesn’t given his advance state of inebriation) that we discussed my breadcrumb theory and the recent (then) coincidences both he and I had had. It was at that point in the evening/early hours that I set out a task for us both to monitor such instances until the years end, to see how many synchronicities and coincidences we could capture and subsequently report back to each other. Sadly it was forgotten about (maybe I didn’t bring it to the ‘priority table’ next time we met).

I know he reads my blog, so I thought it was only right to include one of his very own breadcrumbs that he posted to Facebook today, and a good one it was too. Paste Verbatim:

Breadcrumbs… You want breadcrumbs Mike?? I’ve got a whole loaf here…

We were getting the extension built on our house, and the geezer wot came round to do the doors and windows is Dave Paton, of Paton Glass fame, in Spital.

He’s a handsome lad, all long, curly brown hair, hairy face, chubby of cheek. In fact, every single person who came round here to do jobs, plasterer, plumber, electrician etc, they all thought I was Dave Paton come to do the doors, rather than the customer.

Oh how we chortled.

Still, that’s old news now, life has moved on. Anyway, this morning I was out and about, going about my business, with a car packed tightly with cardboard, polystyrene, plastic etc, remnants from the new kitchen, and I was on my way to the tip to deposit said rubbish there.

Spital is on the way to the tip. I’d been there for about 5 minutes, when I took the latest armful of cardboard boxes up to the relevant container (hey, I’m no reckless miscreant), and a completely random bloke I’ve never met before, also depositing unwanted cardboard into the giant receptacle, said “Dave…”

I ignored this, momentarily, assuming he was talking to somebody else. But, knowing how strange this world can often be, I turned around and said “Sorry mate, were you talking to me?”

“Sorry mate” he said, “I thought you were Dave Paton!”

How I chuckled once again. Then chinned him shouting “that’s my bloody car, you cheeky get!”.

No, of course I didn’t do that. We laughed and went our separate ways.

It really, really IS a very strange world sometimes!

That it be, Ruddo, that it be…

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#1 Only I guide, my inner self
Last summer I experienced probably the most enlightening experience of my life so far (from a spiritual perspective that is) when I was ’attuned’ by a reiki master to Level 1 Practitioner. Words can’t really describe what went on that day, but from that day onwards I was a different person, still an agnostic (for the time being anyway) but closer to my inner self and higher self (if such a thing exists) than I had ever been. I remember last summer so fondly, being completely carefree, stress levels at absolute zero, loving my wife, children and friends more than I had done in many a year.

People have asked me to describe reiki and the experiences I have. It’s difficult. The way it happens for me is like an energy rush but not like adrenaline. I typically find a calm place, away from noise and light if possible, find a comfortable position (depending on my environment) and hit play on my ‘Mikey Bee Zone’ Spotify playlist, those tunes that resonate with me most (mostly sitar/Indian mantra based).

Once prepared, I then start my breathing and grounding exercises and the energy starts to flow in. It usually starts on the crown of my head and almost as quickly, the pineal gland (third eye) is activated joins in for company. From that point, my upper body starts to flood with a tingling sensation, the energy descending my spine and sending offshoots down the meridian lines to each limb. My experiences seem to come in waves as opposed to a constant ‘always on’ feeling. Sometimes these can be quite intense although I can control these now (although it did freak me out at first). One amazing thing though is that my tinnitus helps not hinders. As reiki is, so is tinnitus. They are both frequencies, both products of energy. I have found that when I want to get a ‘natural buzz’ I have the control to turn my tinnitus up to 11 and the power and energy rush that flows within me (and out to others when I practice on them) intensifies, especially when the Hindu mantras kick in.

So last week I started my Level 2 training, whereby my reiki master started to attune me to the reiki power symbols, which from what I can understand so far, increases the energy flow for the practitioner, allowing them to also start to send out energies beyond the immediate vicinity.

Part of my homework was to download a book on the Kindle called ‘Reiki for Life’ which I did and started to read on the train today. The first few chapters were great, even included how reiki ties up with consciousness theories and quantum physics.

Whilst reading the first few chapters, I had a vision/thought of a friend of mine who was going through a bit of a rough time. We talked at the weekend and I had said to her that I would book her in for a reiki session. The spooky thing was that as I was sending a Facebook message to my reiki master to arrange a session for her, a new message came through at that exact moment from said friend, thanking me for listening to her and for giving her some of my pearls of wisdom…

#2 Try what alone
Continuing on with both my train journey and my new reiki manual, I went on to read with interest the writers theories on how our consciousness can manifest itself in the physical realm and that there was a direct connection between the mind, soul and the body.

In the book she cites the example of someone suffering from stress often suffers flu/cold like symptoms, and the more the person operates in the negative space, the higher than chance of illness. She also explained that physical manifestations may also be a sign from the higher self; an ‘other worldly’ message advising us to take a step back and analyse whether there was a specific reason (cause) for a particular ailment (effect).

At that point I briefly stopped reading. My last physical manifestation (January) was ‘allegedly’ cellulitis, a queer affliction in which the flesh becomes enflamed, irritated and swollen, resulting (in my case) to a trip to the doctors to get some antibiotics to reduce the swelling and ease the immediate pain. Over the next week or so, it did improve (aided with some self-reiki in between), and gradually my leg returned to being a leg (although even now there is a small hard mass left at the epicentre of the infection which no doubt will disperse over time).

The reason why I stopped reading was because of the significance. Before the yuletide activities kicked in, I had decided that in 2014, I would do a triathlon, that would be my next physical challenge. So I busied myself with preparatory tasks, which included buying magazines, cancelling yoga in favour of a gym card, and creating a 22 week intense training plan. So today, after reading those words, the realisation, my moment of epiphany was that my cellulitis was a sign, my physical body (or more to the point my subconscious or perhaps higher self) was sending me a message not to do it. But why?

I know why. The last time I set my self such a physical challenge was the Spartan Race Series in 2102. I had it in my head that if my body was fit, then the probability of me living longer life was a lot higher than the previous beer-swilling, pie-eating me. So I took it upon myself to selfishly book myself on the series challenge which involved 6 obstacle races across the length and breadth of the UK (at great expense). Sure at the end of it I was physically fitter. Sure it was a hell of an achievement finishing 88 out of 130,000 Spartans worldwide. But what I had failed to realise was the lack of focus on the truly important things in life. I was blinkered, a man on a mission, not seeing that his marriage was falling apart, and it so very nearly did.

So in a moment of clarity today, on a train heading back down to the place which started out my spiritual rot and path of selfishness, I realised that I would not take part in the triathlon, I would delete the Excel file with the 22 week training programme at my earliest convenience…

#3 Not the 9 o’clock News
TV in the UK is crap. Official. There I was sitting in a hotel room flicking through the channels on the TV, endlessly flicking through the channels on the TV, finding nothing on every channel on the TV. Bored, I decided to start to read my reiki manual again. For some reason I could not concentrate, could not get back into it at all, even though it was a fascinating read.

I had no idea of the time. I may have been sitting on the bed in the hotel for days, weeks even. A wave of sadness came over me at that point, not being there with my wife who I had not been apart from (with work at least) for 3 months. I reached over for my phone (still not realising when it was we last contacted each other or what time it was) and as I did so, just before my fingers made contact with the screen, my 9 o’clock alarm went off. As it does every night to the sound of Dean Martin’s voice crooning out the lines from “That’s Amore”, my daily reminder to kiss my wife wherever I was on our little blue dot. Today being no exception, instead of a physical connection, and emoticon of a pair of lips had to suffice…

#4 A Brief History of Time
I had a job interview on Monday, and in preparation I created a slide deck with some bullet points on, reminders of what I had done over the course of my career. On the opening page, it had my name on and a strap line underneath which said “A Brief History of Time”. So after sending my wife a kiss via the Vodafone network, I closed my reiki manual and launched the Netflix app on my Kindle and started to browse for something to watch. I could have picked anything. Comedy. Drama. Stand up. Horror. Although I had seen it before, I decided upon Donnie Darko, as the Directors Cut had recently been added to the UK collection.

On it went (and for the record it’s no better than the silver screen cut but it does add some interesting snippets) and back I sat, all pillows plumped. I instantly recognised that the opening track (my favourite Echo and the Bunnymen song “The Killing Moon”) had been replaced by INXS’s “Never Tear Us Apart”, which I couldn’t fathom out why as it added no extra significance in my mind.

Half way through the movie, Donnie (played by Jake Gyllenhaal) talks to his science teacher (played by Noah Wyle) about the possibility of time travel. A short while later after some discussion, the teacher gives Donnie a book called “The Philosophy of Time Travel” which was penned by an old hermit woman in the town. As he does so the camera pans left to reveal a copy of Stephen Hawking’s “A Brief History of Time” sittng on the teachers desk.

“What if you could go back in time, and take all those hours of pain and darkness and replace them with something better?”…

2 thoughts on “Breadcrumb Diary: Week 9

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